It’s 9 in the morning on a Friday, hours before Sakata Gintoki is anywhere near the peak of wakefulness. Supressing a yawn, he leans his back against a dirty brick wall in a nondescript Kabukicho alley, contemplating whether he should wait out the company of his friends or go back home to the comfort of his futon and dreams of a certain blonde-haired neighbor. He closes his eyes, remembering the feeling of Tsukuyo’s skin- skimming his cheek, under his own fingertips, on his tongue. “Ahahaha, Kintoki! Hisashiburi! It’s been too long! ” Ah, well that’s the end of his quiet morning.
Not long enough if you’re still coming around here- and it’s Gintoki. Gin-To-Ki. ” He grumbles, annoyed at the interruption, even if the laughing idiot is partly the reason he was standing in the dirty alley to begin with. “Where’s Zura? He only ever comes out from under his rock to vandalize public property with that ridiculous duck cartoon. ” “It’s not Zura, it’s Katsura. ” A hooded mess of long black hair emerges from the shadows of the buildings. “Also, Elizabeth is a symbol. ” “Katsura! How’s it hanging? I’ve brought the stuff ahahah. ” Katsura smiles at him. I have been well, thank you.. ” “Oi, oi, what stuff? Why’re you dragging me into your criminal activities? ” Katsura sighs.
“Gintoki, I assure you that I’ve enlisted your help, even under illicit means, only for the sake of this country. ” He wrinkles his nose. “Besides, you’re hardly an exemplary citizen yourself. ” Gintoki scoffs. “I never agreed to help you with anything. Also, aren’t you a little old to be drawing on walls, Zura? ” “It’s not Zura, it’s Katsura, and this project is not just vandalism, as you call it. It is art, but more than that, it is a statement. Katsura raises his chin, taking a defiant stance. “Elizabeth is a figure of freedom. The Japanese people have been imprisoned by their vices for years from mobile phones to this very district we are standing in right now. ” Katsura pounds a fist against the brick wall beside him to emphasize his point.
“For such an advanced society, we are constrained by these inventions that only serve to replicate human contact. ” “Oi, Zura, what does this. ” “Robots- that is, scraps of metal, plastic and silicon- are taking away jobs from real women. Prostitutes have it tough as it is! Gintoki’s interruption doesn’t seem to faze the man. “Shouldn’t we use our technological advancement for better things than trying to invent a new thing to stick your dick in? ” His voice had gone up in volume during his rant. “Is it really so hard to become attracted to another living, real, breathing person? Why must we invent holograms to please the general public’s libido? ” Gintoki sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “That’s rich coming from you, Zura.
You’re the most socially inept person out of all of us. ” Katsura throws him a glare. “But I guess I’ll help you just this once. Katsura turns his entire body to look at Gintoki, his eyes adapting a watery quality, he notices his mouth wobbles even before he speaks. “Really, Gintoki? ” “Tch, yeah. Now hurry up and tell me what you want me to do before I change my mind. ” Saluting, Katsura turns to run down the alley, down the same direction Tatsuma had disappeared down just a little earlier in the exchange. “Bring ’em in, Sakamoto! ” Over the sound of a truck backing up, Sakata Gintoki hears unreasonably loud chortling, and knows immediately that he had made a grave mistake.
Katsura turns to face him, the sunlight hits his long black hair and projects the shimmering quality of his olive eyes. “Gintoki, I present to you The Renho Project. ” Then, the door of the ton truck slides open to reveal- “Oi, Zura I thought you said this would be an art project. ” Katsura blinks at him. “It is, Gintoki. ” A snap sounds through the alley, although it’s a hypothetical one, meant to represent Gintoki’s patience running out completely. “THEN WHY ARE THERE ONLY DUCKS IN HERE? ” And there are indeed rows of stacked cages, each holding a white American Pekin duck, or so according to the tags on each cage.
Katsura laughs, high and hearty, jumping into the cave of domestic birds. “Oh, Gintoki- this is art! ” “No, you dunce- these are fucking animals. ” Gintoki shouts. “I thought I’d be painting some shitty cartoon onto bathroom stalls. ” The long haired idiot unhooks one of the cage pins and picks up the bird, laughing good naturedly. “That’s a very narrow definition of art, Gintoki. See, I had garnered inspiration from feeding the ducks in the park back when I had travelled to America. ”
He begins to pet the duck serenely, a far-away gaze painted over his face. I had befriended one in particular- Elizabeth is what they called themself. See, Gintoki, art is anything that is pulled from within, often with the intention to pull at the insides of others. ” “OI- YOU. ” Gintoki grabs a dopey- faced Sakamoto by the lapels and shakes. “Are you the one who shipped all these American ducks to Japan? ” “Ahahaha, you shouldn’t be so loud, Kintoki, you’ll take away the element of surprise. ” The silver haired man stops his throttling to look back at Katsura. “Oi, Zura, what’s this idiot talking about? “Why, we will be releasing the Elizabeths onto Kabukicho’s main street. ”
The man has the gall to use a tone that implies his intentions would be the obvious course of action. “Are you joking? Oi, I live here you idiots, why would you make me do this to my own neighborhood? ” Katsura is now standing beside the two perm heads. The morning sunshine illuminates the three- four including duck- in a manner that suggests innocence and light as opposed to their statuses of criminal and accomplices. “Hm, I guess that does serve as a small foil in our plans. ” “Pssh, our plans?
What are you even hoping to accomplish with this? ” Gintoki gestures wildly at the duck truck. “Ahahaha, he already told you, Kintoki! It’s a statement. ” “Of what? ” Gintoki notices that his voice has begun to take on a desperate tone. “What kind of message are you hoping to send? In what world does it make sense to release tons of illegally imported wildlife into a busy entertainment district? Your doodles were harmless, but I am drawing the line here, Zura. ”
Katsura’s face had remained impassive during his tirade, a hand idly strokes the duck in his arms. Hm. You are right Gintoki. ” “Oh, excellent, I’m the voice of reason here. ” “The caricatures are too small of a precursor for a demonstration of this mass. ” Locking away the duck, Katsura begins to take notes on a memo pad. “Yes, yes. We must delay the release of our feathered friends here until we have built up an adequate foundation, otherwise the depth of our discourse will be lost amongst the flurry of white down. ”
Clapping the booklet shut, Katsura grins at a laughing Sakamoto and a tired- looking Gintoki. Excellent work, Gintoki. Sakamoto- if it’s not too much, I must ask you to keep the stuff in a humane storage facility for a while longer. ” Sakamoto flashes a thumbs up and begins scrolling through his phone, presumably looking for the facility’s number. “Oi, if we’re done, I’d like to go home. ” Gintoki rubs at his eyes and yawns. “I’m beat from trying to keep up with both of your skewed logic. ” “Ah, Gintoki, we’re not done yet. You must stay with us to continue planning for The Renho Project: Draft 2. ” **
