Worldviews are sets of basic beliefs, images, and values that make up a way of looking at and making sense of the world around us. Our basic beliefs affect not only the way we think about ourselves and our place in the world but they also determine what questions are morally right to ask. I’ve deeply held case values/beliefs that I’ve learned as a very young child or developed often without being conscious of it they stem from daily life experiences as well as occurrences our worldviews plays powerful roles whether we’re aware of them or not, they derive from our relationships with nature.
Social experiences, cultural beliefs, family background and other personal influences have shaped my views on the issues dealing with trust. There are some things that are always right or wrong despite the circumstances or situation whether an act is right or wrong depends on how, when, why, and by whom it was done. The environment in which I grew up impacted how I see the world. It didn’t define, but it shaped my perspective.
As I reflect on my past experiences one significant irrational care belief I have about myself is that other people cannot be trusted. If I trust someone they will let me down, hurt, disappoint take advantage of and even betray me. This irrational care belief came from my early dating days. This was perceived or interpreted from experiences. Growing up I had absolutely no reason to doubt anyone. I was always trusting and one who always made myself available to others. I was and often put myself on the forefront to help anyone in need.
Due to past experiences, family, friend, loved ones took advantage of my weaknesses and betrayed me in any way shape or form. I was taught to help individuals in need and in doing so I was dragged through the mud and back. These beliefs have impacted my worldview. I have a difficult time allowing others into my bubble (life) I have a tendency of avoiding people and have refrained from having a social life, allowing people into my circle will lead to nothing but pain, suffering and even drama.
Looking back. When I began dating my daughters father I devoted myself and to one man. I was raised seeing my mother and stepfather struggling to make their relationship thrive despite obstacles that came their way. I used to wonder “why my mother would spend endless nights crying for days” but yet, due to circumstances she managed to deal with life’s many stressors in an effort to save her marriage. Watching my parents strive to save their marriage taught me to not give up on a mate and to resolve issues by communicating with one another.
In many ways, this core belief have impacted my daily life in so many ways I have a difficult time trusting people now such as family, friends, peers and even my loved ones. I have considered attending therapy sessions as order to address this issue and how to accept individuals and cope with my fear of this. I believe in order to allow individuals into my life I need to learn to deal with matters that affect me the most and by understanding the root of it all I will gain knowledge on how to manage and/or overcome my fear.
Over the course of the years, others have viewed me as someone that refuses to open up, one that shelters herself and she’s away from positive peer and social interactions. I’ve always been the reserved one. When meeting people for the very first time, I have a tendency of withdrawing attention. This has definitely impacted my relationship with others. No matter how hard I’ve tried to seclude myself and stay away from interacting with peers someone always ends up betraying or hurting me.
I’ve come to the realization that bad things happen to good people and good people do not deserve or attract these events. I’ve learned each event influenced my worldview in some shape or form. Even though events influenced and shape us, we must ultimately choose our mindset and path. My last experience shaped what I believe about the present. These experiences served me well throughout my life other although they may have served me well in the past, are no longer helpful. It’s basically up to me to decide which had meaning and change what I can. Nowadays, I have began to learn to trust. I’ve allowed individuals to come into my life I continue to have my guard up and unintentionally screen those people I feel can be a triple threat.