For those of you who don’t already know what sexting is or haven’t heard of it before, it is basically a marriage of sex and the traditional text messaging. It is defined in most dictionaries as the sending of sexually explicit photos, images, text messages, or emails by using a cell phone or other mobile devices. Sexting as we know it today is a relatively new concept, probably as new as the almighty selfie. But the idea of communicating secret love messages is probably as old as writing itself. The advent and boom of technology however has made sexting into what it is today.
There is no specific profile of who participates in sexting, it cuts across all ages, background and ethnicity. All it takes is two people with a mobile device who are comfortable sending each other sexual text and images. It is a very powerful foreplay tool, sometimes so powerful to the point that it seems as good as the actual act can’t ever be as good. Why do we sext? The answer to this question is simple and obvious. Everybody likes to hear or see something sexy about somebody that they are interested in. People engage in sexting because they can just sit behind a screen and say things that they might not be able to say to someone’s face.
It is a form of seduction and couples have found it useful in sparking up or spicing up their sex life. A lover can send a hot sexy text of picture to his or her partner while they are away from each other and they can both use this as a tool to build anticipation towards whatever sexual encounter they will eventually go on to have when they see each other. So some people engage in sexting to keep their love life active and hot and it can be seen as a way of letting your partner know you are still interested in and aroused by them. Is it healthy? We all love sexting and it’s the hip thing to do now.
You almost feel bad if you’re left out. So much so that young people consider themselves e-virgins if they haven’t engaged in the act with people they are interested in that way. Is it healthy? Well ultimately, yes it is. Just like any other pleasure of this life, it can become unhealthy if there is an overdependence or addiction to it or if it is used by people who shouldn’t be engaged in it but if we use it just right, it is in fact a very healthy tool to improving sexual experience. Couples who are away from each other can have a very sexy conversation that can be as arousing as it could be bonding.
Younger people or teenagers who are experimenting can use it as a means to exploring their own sexualities at their own pace without being pressured to do anything they’d rather not do and get into trouble. However there are bad sides to sexting, some people go overboard with it and expectations are so sky high that eventually the real thing is mostly disappointing. Method First of all sexting is basically communicating sexual thoughts and feelings via text, image or even codes. Some people are very good with words and do it with only words, some people do it with only sexual images and most people employ a combination of both.
However you chose to engage in sexting, there is a method to it if you want to achieve the best results. I will attempt to touch on the how tos and how not tos and give tips that can help you do it the right way. First of all you need to be sure the person you’re sexting with will be receptive of your messages. You need a willing partner otherwise it’s going to be a one way street and where is the fun in that. Don’t go straight into the dirty text and pictures, you need to first gauge interest and reception before going hardcore. Start softly and build up the tension. Take this convo for instance: Guy: Hey girl
Girl: Hi Guy: Thinking of you Girl: Really? Do tell Guy: I can’t wait to be alone with you tonight. Girl: Go on Guy: The moment I have you in my arms, my kisses will start from your neck and down to your breasts. Girl: Oh dear Guy: I will bite your hard nipples lightly and make my way down south. Girl: OMG. You’re making me so hot The convo will go on but the message here is both parties are willing participants, the sexual tension was built up slowly and it can climax a few messages back and forth after. Don’t go crazy like you’re going to choke her, slap her and spit on her etc because you might just scare her away.
Tread lightly at first and slowly reel her in and then work your way into those dirty messages. If you are a dominant woman, just be direct and ask questions like, what are you going to do to me? What have you thought about doing to me? I’m so hot for you right now, I can’t wait for you to be inside of me etc. Also this is for the ladies, don’t start what you can’t finish. Don’t stop halfway in the sexts, try to keep up the pace, don’t stop at the middle and leave a guy hanging there with his blue balls. If you aren’t interested or can’t go the distance, don’t even start it in the first place.
Be a little creative with your words to show you are interested, don’t use the same words over and over again. According to sex therapist Annie Harwick, the idea that men are more visual and that women need to be stimulated through the mind is completely a stereotype. Sexual stimulation is really a per person based situation. So some women are as stimulated sexually as men when they see a sexy picture. However men are very visual beings and the anatomy of a woman is always very pleasing to look at. From the boobs, to the ass, to the vajayjay, men will be turned on very quickly when they see a picture of these body parts.
In the anatomy of a man however, all we have to work on is mostly always the dick pic but it can also achieve the same effects of arousal in women if taken properly. Guys when you take pictures of your dick you need to make sure to make it as appealing as you possibly can. You need to get the angles right, the lighting must be sufficient and last but not least, nobody wants to see your flaccid dick, take that picture when you are hard and about to bust a nut and take it right. Even if you are small down there, with the right angle you can make your dick look triumphant and big in the dick pic.
Again, nobody wants to see a bushy and unshaven or unkempt dick pic so keep it as clean and smooth as possible down there before taking the picture. Also include a part of the rest of your body. A close up picture of your dick is boring in isolation. Perhaps lastly, work your way up to the dick pic, start with a shirtless photo, tease her and show off your self-confidence and then hit her with the dick pic. For the ladies, you can hardly ever do anything wrong in this regard because guys will take whatever you give them. But you can make the experience very exciting and pleasurable for the both of you if you do it right.
Do a lot of teasing by first taking pictures of yourself loosely clothed but not naked. Take pictures of your cleavage and then move on to taking pictures of your breast but with your hands covering your nipples. Then after building up the sexual tension you can go into revealing more and more of your body to him. It will drive him crazy. Sexting is fun and we all love it but please be careful who you sext with and be careful how you do it. When you are sending naked pictures of yourself, try as much as possible not to include your face in these pictures.
Quite often you hear of bitter ex-lovers who go on to reveal to the public their stash of your naked pictures. Don’t send a naked picture to someone you are not sure would want to receive it. And please only send these pictures to people whom you know and have met before. The National Campaign reports that 15% of teens who have sent nude images of themselves send these messages to people they have never met, but know from the internet. This is careless behavior and should be refrained from. Have fun sexting the right and proper way. It can be very gratifying.